My second job was pretty awesome. When I was about to turn 16, my uncle got me a job at a party place. It was the place that you would call to get balloons, clowns, and streamers. Cool, right? So, having taken seven years of Tae-Kwon-Do, I was the perfect fit for this job. What job you ask? Why, dressing up as Power Rangers and going to people’s houses for birthday parties. Not just Power Rangers, but I also dressed up as other stuff, too, like Mickey Mouse, and maybe Fred Flintstone. Possibly Barney, too. I know they did Barney. So, onto the stories.

This was a dozen years ago so you have to remember that XBox, Playstation, and the internet weren’t as prevalent as they are in today’s society. That’s an important fact to remember for this.

We serviced many areas of town, uptown, downtown, around town. The majority of them, though, were A Street, B Street, which, if you remember from your Social Studies class, are not pleasing, pleasant, or welcoming areas. They were basically, if not 100%, the ghetto. So picture this, if you will…

I get out of the car, a 15 year old scrawny kid dressed like the red Power Ranger in the ghetto. It was the perfect setup for anything, right?

I go to these houses and the kids loved me. It was up to me whether or not I talked, but I had to keep character the whole time. Most of the time, I didn’t talk because I didn’t want to give away my identity of a non-Power Ranger. I had to keep up appearances, you know? There was one time where I remember talking because I taught a karate class in the peoples front yard. Front kick, back kick, left punch, right punch. I used to mess with kids all the time by making them do left kick, right kick, both kicks. Kids can’t do both kicks. Adults can’t do both kicks. Jean Claude can do both kicks. Jean Claude could do splits no problem.

The parents though, the parents…they didn’t care. It was one hour of their time, your time, the kids time that they hated life more than they did and hour prior to your arrival. They used to just leave the room, sometimes the house, for the 45 minutes you were there. Most of the times they just smoked. Someone I went with, probably a magician, told me that the parents smoked weed in the other room while he performed. Lame. I went with a clown once. She had sweet boobs, I remember that.

I am going to leave you with that. Perfect. See you next time.